Bloody fiction. how to break a guitar

Bloody fiction. how to break a guitar

How to break a guitarWell let’s try to cheer up. We will focus on the ruthless smashing of guitars about all that is stronger than the guitar… And so… You are in a disgusting state! And all because of the vagaries of bad guitar that breaks down in the hands and does not produce sound quality that is required of her… she now and then something breaks down: increases the distance between the strings and the fretboard (which is typical for most acoustic guitars, a big and scary ugly crack on the shirt, climb the frets and the fretboard like the Board to erase linen, no pickup or (horror!!!) actually something has broken inside and You don’t know WHAT. If this happened, that is a surefire way to commit an act of revenge against the «guitar». As you may have guessed, we will talk about how to take the life that once caressed the ear and tenderly shook hands.

the Way to number 1

Suppose, You are in pretty tipsy state in the same company. You feel that enemies are around, although a moment ago it seemed otherwise. In addition, by happy coincidence, in the hands of your enemy guitar … :} the only Thing you need is to find the enemy’s face and begin operations. Take the guitar at the neck so that your right hand was closer to the drum, and the left, respectively, at a convenient distance from the right hand on the same stamp. Still not enough important is the fact that determines which side the enemy will fly guitar, the rear part of the drum or, respectively, the front (this option leaves the most painful feelings at the enemy, but does not guarantee the complete defeat of the guitar due to its structurally physical properties). And so the instrument correctly lies in the hands, the goal is defined, eat on. Now the main thing how to swing. The scale can be made with shoulder and behind my head. In this case, the resultant will be the way in which movements are made from the shoulder, but not worth much to ward off the outstretched hands back. This can lead to a weakening of the shock. Slightly bending the arms at the elbow joints, bring to feel the full force of the coming blow, obotrites on purpose, with all the negative energy together, you can remember all the bad and not related to this goal… having Done all of the above, it is possible to tell with confidence that You are ready to counter attack, to transgress… do it… break it… daaaaa!!!! Oh yeah… Then look at the resulting makovy tool and please rate on a scale the result.

Method number 2

unlike the first method, this method is typical for electric guitar. The network of this method consists in the following. Live order and can not be used, because the purpose of this may no longer be up. For this barbarism fit a simple concrete floor, asphalt or Red square at worst. This time should be taken with both hands in one place, situated at the edge of the bar, closer to the headstocks. You swing better of with a shoulder and not from the head, and not be afraid of this word, from the floor. Explain, imagine that you are not in the hands of the guitar, and sledgehammer and You need to break something big and very strong. So, take the guitar to what they did all became sour… Legs slightly bend as if to sit down, angry at Chubais, that has not given us electricity, and no persuasion from the electric guitar, as must give off line forever…Scope and all to the dogs, rubbish, waste, force majeure way… But as in the first cases, it should then go back and with horror and tears to evaluate all for the same five-point scale.

Method number 3

This is the easiest option. Just pick up a chainsaw or (if not available) simple saw with great divorce and comfortable handle. We saw the guitar on six parts, on the fingerboard, a pair of horns and three pieces of shirts. All this can be folded slide… or shove in the fridge, just don’t do the latter, so as not to injure mother…you can Also wrap each of the cutters in a beautiful festive wrap and sadrith absolutely strangers who capnut for free, without looking, and You what? Because you waste not need… you Know that You did with the received pieces, try to assess on the same five-point scale, and the result to remember.

the Way the number 4

This option is good if the disease is caught you at the rehearsal in the circle of musicians and friends. Around You everything comes to the game, and …(as stated) does not play it bitch. Should I be offended and shrunken from the upscale drive the column that wheezing and nothing more. And the drums are a different story altogether. Twit from St. Patrick’s day, it sounds like you do not play on the drums, and the plywood some of the company ’Danila master» limited liability… Well, then, as we think, everything is clear, the guitar for the trunk and Bay, crush everything not nailed and at a reasonable price. Crash to clean the column, to carry off the face of the earth reels and do not leave alive a weapon, it also chips…But after such an act can directly go get drunk with grief for a lost tools, to burst into tears and go to a psychiatric hospital… Try all the same and then look at myself in the same scale.

Bloody fiction. Parts of the guitar

P.S. If You appreciated their actions have gone up 8 points, you’re still quite tolerable, You can be trusted and the Stradivarius violin… Typing from 9 to 15, You find yourself in the middle. It’s impossible, it would be so, and in the extreme to fall.
People with a total score of 16 to 20, not mentally balanced, though, and became the leaders of this creation, with which We congratulate You. You would only destroy and destroy, and to build up who will? Cheburashka?

Author: Teddy